Dating body type descriptions
The Guyliner takes a look at how to navigate the dangerous world of torso tropes Do you remember where you were when you first heard the expression “dad bod”?
It’s strange how evocative a term can be, can’t it?
That you take care of yourself, yes, you’re committed to exercise and monitoring your nutrition, for better or worse – beware of fad diets and their effect on bad breath.
They are marked as cuddly, or the dreaded “jolly”, or branded a teddy bear, all to make them sound less threatening, more lovable – though you do also get hulks and daddies offering a slightly different proposition, but perhaps that’s a story for another day.The dad bod was sold as an empowering reassurance that even though we couldn’t grift as many Instagram likes as our chiselled bros, we still had it – with no confirmation of what “it” actually was.As a body-confidence sell, the dad bod was, for me, the “singer-songwriter” of body types, a punt at authenticity but ultimately, as a body confidence sell, a failure.If you’re a skinny guy you could perhaps play up the geeky angle – even though many a nerd has discovered protein shakes; it’s all getting very Peter Parker out there – or perhaps take advantage of the fact every clothing house on earth designs with you in mind and reinvent yourself as a fashionista.You could be slim for any number of reasons – salad fandom, genes, whatever – but as I learned from my beanpole days, once their worship of your waistline subsides, things can get tired, and middle-aged spread is waiting to board its flight, so make sure your personality isn’t also on the lean side.
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It was that old devil knocking at the door again: masculinity.